Posted by: Andy Farmer

I’m a lifelong Georgia Bulldog football fan.  One of the things that makes it particularly easy to root for the ‘Dawgs’ these days is their head coach, Mark Richt.  Mark is a top quality head coach who also happens to be a very upfront Christian man. 

If you’ve ever seen the movie “Facing the Giants”, there’s a scene where the high school coach is in the locker room before the big state championship football game.  In walks a strapping man who is referred to just as ‘Coach’, who proceeds to encourage the high school coach on the game, but more importantly on playing for the glory of God.  That ‘Coach’ is Mark Richt, and the little movie cameo tells you a couple of things about him.  For one, it tells you how big football is in the state of Georgia, where the movie was filmed.  He comes into the movie and isn’t even named, yet the viewer is supposed to know this appearance is a BIG DEAL in the movie.  But more important, the fact that Richt is willing to come into an overtly evangelistic movie and lend his cache tells you something about what he wants to represent.

This past October ESPN ran a feature story on Richt in a lesser known aspect of his life – his role as husband and father.  The piece describes the Richt family’s adoption of two small children from the Ukraine.  Mark Richt is a major college football coach, but his impact seems to be significant off the field as well. 

Posted By Rob Flood

It is a wonderful thing…to be known by our spouse. To feel understood…to know that you are truly loved…as you are. For some, this reality comes and goes. For still others, this is just a hope…a wish. For these people, marriage is not a place where they are truly known and loved, but a place where they are judged…misunderstood…taken for granted.

And so, we hold out hope that things will change. We long to be understood…to be truly loved…as we are. We long to be known and not rejected. The longing is a right one to have…we were designed by a loving Creator to be known and not rejected…to be loved as we are. And, though it is a wonderful thing when it happens with a spouse, marriage is not the primary place that this knowing and loving ought to occur.

Consider Psalm 103 for a moment. If you have the time, read the whole thing. (You won’t regret it.) If not, at least consider these verses:

6The LORD works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed. 7 He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the people of Israel. 8 The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. 9 He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. 10 He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; 12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. 13 As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him. 14 For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.

To be truly known…and truly loved, we are to turn to the Lord first. We are to see his righteousness and justice on our behalf. We are to see his mercy and grace, his patience and love directed toward us. We are to see our sin, yes, but moreso his kindness in not repaying us according to our iniquities. We are to see that he knows our frame…and that such a great God considers just how lowly we are…and has compassion upon us.

We are to see these things and rest. Rest, knowing that we are known. Rest, knowing that we are objects of mercy and grace, not wrath and condemnation. When we were unlovable and opposed to God, God loved us and drew us near. As high and as far as we can imagine, so great is God’s steadfast love toward us.

It is a wonderful thing…to be known by our spouse. To experience the grace and mercy that comes in a truly knowing and understanding marriage relationship. How much greater is the joy, the peace, the comfort of resting in the great knowledge of Christ. He knows are frame, our flaws, our sin, our weaknesses. And, in the face of those, showers his children with love, compassion, and longsuffering. Truly, this is all we could ever hope for. Praise God for hope…and his provision in fulfilling that hope. How great is our God.

Posted by: Andrea Sharp

Not too long ago my daughter Rosie and I went for an early morning walk before breakfast.  I walk and she rides her scooter—good exercise for both of us.  She’s a real trooper especially since winter mornings can be so cold.  As we entered the kitchen I was starving!  She asked if I would make her some hot chocolate, but the first thing that came to my mind was my loud stomach and hunger pangs!  I announced it was time for her to learn to make her own hot chocolate.  I barked out the steps as she got the milk and the chocolate sauce out.  Meanwhile I was chomping down on my shredded wheat (something not even tasty—which my family continually reminds me).  She finally got her hot chocolate, but as she sat down I was off toward the rest of my day and my agenda.

Later that morning we were reading the book Heaven for kids by Randy Alcorn, and the few pages we read were about good deeds which do not earn our way to Heaven, but nonetheless please God and can bring rewards for us in heaven.  Alcorn gave some examples saying, “Good works include helping and doing kind things for people, such as visiting someone in a nursing home, baking cookies for your neighbor, or making hot chocolate for a family member.”  (p. 105).  Startling, you would think.  But I was dull to my heart, and it took a while for this timely little rebuke to from the Lord to sink in.  Later that night, by God’s grace, I was able to confess at our fellowship group, and I started to see my selfishness and God’s grace to reveal it to me.  “For truly I say to you, whoever gives you a cup of water to drink because you belong to Christ will by no means lose his reward.”  (Mark 9:41)  I realize I missed an opportunity that day, but thankfully the lesson has not been lost on me.  I try to be quick now to offer hot chocolate when we return, and I am the one who is blessed when I see her face as she slurps up those marshmallows.

God is so kind to not leave us to ourselves.  If any of you ladies can relate to my selfishness and the difficulty of serving your children over and over in what seems at times to be a thankless job, remember that the Lord is not asleep.  He is an ever present help.  He is able to bring our sins to our attention, grant us forgiveness and extend grace for change.  He cares about even the smallest things.  He will bless the dishing of love in any form we give it – hot chocolate included.  What an amazing God we serve!

Posted by: Andy Farmer

Pedagogy is an old word with Greek origins that means ‘teaching’.  When we talk about the ‘pedagogy’ of God we’re talking about how God is a teacher to his people.  We’re accustomed to thinking about how God teaches as the Spirit opens our minds and hearts in the experience of hearing or reading God’s word.  But God also pedagogues us through our afflictions.  Whether we learn what God is teaching depends on whether we acknowledge or embrace what some have called ‘the school of affliction’ – seeing God’s merciful and wise hand in the difficulties we face in life.  In a post on the Desiring God web site, John Piper recently gave his thoughts on God’s education of his children in the school of affliction.

In this week's Taste & See Article, I pointed out from Psalm 119: 67 and 71 that God sends affliction to help us learn his word.

‘Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word. . . . It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes.’

I didn't ask how affliction helps us understand God's word and keep it.  There are innumerable answers, as there are innumerable experiences.  But here are five:

1. Affliction takes the glibness of life away and makes us more serious so that our mindset is more in tune with the seriousness of God's word.
2. Affliction knocks worldly props from under us and forces us to rely more on God which brings us more in tune with the aim of the word.
3. Affliction makes us search the scriptures with greater desperation for help rather than treating it as marginal to life.
4. Affliction brings us into the fellowship of Christ's sufferings so that we fellowship more closely with him and see the world more readily through his eyes.
5. Affliction mortifies deceitful and distracting fleshly desires, and so brings us into a more spiritual frame which fits God's word more.

I pray that we will not begrudge the pedagogy of God.  

So, fellow disciple, what are you learning in your afflictions class these days?

Posted by: Jason Russell

Family devotions with 3 little boys is always an adventure.  I’ve seen peaceful seconds of holy teaching about Jesus and His love erupt into an all out battle over who gets to help daddy turn the page in the Bible.  One moment I’m exegeting on God’s slowness to anger and abounding love, the next I’m raising my voice as if to act out God on Mt. Sinai bringing wrath upon kids who can’t control their little wiggling bodies.  Yeah, we have a long way to go in this house.  Yet, by the grace of God, we continue on.  At the short time we’ve been at this, here are some things I’ve seen God really bless for us that may be an encouragement for other families with young kids: 

1. Start with realistic expectations.  Long, deep devotionals, I’ve noticed, don’t generally work with energetic 2 and 3 year olds.  Our most effective moments are usually those that are short, sweet and to the point.  One truth, point of application for that day, a prayer for grace and we’re on our way.  It helps, too, to point back to this throughout the day, reminding them of what we learned and highlighting ways God answered prayers prayed that morning.
    
2. Promise Kingdom lessons are our friends.  Repetition and routine really impact our kids.  I take Sunday’s children’s ministry lesson and work through it slowly with them Monday through Friday.  God always gives some fresh application or something new pops out that we didn’t see the day before.  On Saturday we begin discussing the lesson for the next week.
3. Don’t forget the memory verses.  My kids love these.  They like it when we all compete as a family to see who can say it “all by myself!”  It’s a good way for all of us to be hiding the Word in our hearts.  Taken from the Promise Kingdom plan, we work on one verse a month.
4. Switch it up.  Doing different things to keep their attention has been effective.  Sometimes we look at and talk about the pictures in the Big Picture Story Bible.  Other times we take images from their other favorite books to explain a biblical concept.  Most often we simply read and talk about the words in the passage that carry tangible images for the kids.  And sometimes we just do our memory verse and pray.  Changing things up a bit keeps all of our attention and makes it fun.
5. Lead by example.  The best thing I can do to foster a love in our kids for God’s Word is to love it myself.  Our family devotions are vibrant when I’ve been regularly in God’s word and excited about learning and growing in Him.   

Of course, it always helps to remember the reason why we do all this and God’s promises to bless His Word.  Our hope and our prayer is that the Lord will bless these times and that through the truths of His Word, our children will come to know and love Him as their God and Savior.  Since He has “brought us forth by the word of truth,” we have hope that He will act on our children’s hearts that they may “receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save [their] souls” James 1:18, 21. 

Posted By Rob Flood

Do you remember the show M*A*S*H?  Remember that teddy-bear-loving, company clerk, Radar O’Reilly? He had the uncanny ability of finishing other people’s thoughts and sentences.  He began carrying out directions before his superior officer was done giving them.  After a while, particularly with Colonel Henry Blake, the instructions became incomplete and spotty because he already knew what Colonel Blake was going to say. 

Have you noticed this can sometimes happen in our marriages?  One spouse starts a thought and the other finishes it.  At times, this can be a great asset and, I suppose, it’s only natural as people get to know each other.  But, as beneficial as this can be, there is often a dangerous side effect that is not nearly as helpful…I call it marital shorthand.

Rather than, “Gina, can you please get me a drink of water” it becomes “Hon, I need some water.”  Rather than, “Gina, I’m so sorry for what I said, will you please forgive me for being insensitive and vengeful?” it becomes “Hon, I was an idiot.”

We assume, because our spouse knows our thoughts, that they know we are thankful…they know we are sorry.  And, before long, we drift from incomplete thoughts, such as those listed above, to the unspoken thought.  “She knows I love her…she doesn’t need me to say it.”  Marital shorthand on a steep decline.

How can you know if you’ve fallen victim to marital shorthand?  Here’s just a couple helpful signs:

- The absence of basic manners: Assuming that basic manners are a regular part of your life with your friends and co-workers, the absence of basic manners with your spouse could indicate the presence of marital shorthand.  Take the time to say please, thank you, excuse me, I’m sorry, will you forgive me, your welcome, God bless you, etc.  It’s worth the effort.

- Creating offenses where none were intended:  Though there are additional reasons this might be occurring, it is worth asking the question, “Has my curtness of speech created an offense?” 

- Is my manner of speaking significantly different than when we first got married?:  Do you tell your spouse of your love as often as you once did?  Are you as intentional with your words now as you were 5, 10, 15, 20 years ago? 

In addition to these symptoms, one sign of caution should be pointed out to you.  You may be newly married or in a present state of marital bliss.  You should know that on the final step before the plunge into marital shorthand stands a sign which reads, “Sweetheart, this could never happen to us!”  If you’ve said that during your reading of this blog, buckle your seat belt…you’re probably in for a plunge.

Marital shorthand comes on like a friend: “I guess we’re getting to know each other really well…look how comfortable we are talking to each other.”  But, in the end, it serves as a fierce enemy: “What ever happened to our love?  We’re not as close as we once were.” 

Celebrate when you are so close that you can finish each other’s sentences.  Such relational intimacy is worth celebrating.  After all, Radar was a handy guy to have around.  However, when you lose kindness and grace from your speech, cancel the celebration and start a prayer meeting.  Such conversational carelessness will surely work against you and your marriage in the end.

Posted by: Andy Farmer

This past Sunday Marty Machowski preached a message in our Family Life series entitled “Growing Families Toward the Future.  Marty preached from Exodus 10, the plague of locusts.  If you’re interested in finding out how this text relates to raising our families, check out his message here.

In his message, Marty appealed that God has called us to affect generations to come by sharing with our children the great story of redemption through Christ.  He said,

“When we tell them the story we connect them to a God who saw them before they were ever born.  We connect them to a God who wrote the most magnificent story with them in mind.  The Story begins way before the first plague.  It begins just after the fall when God, looking down through the corridor of history tells Eve, I will raise up one of your children to crush the head of the serpent.  And it carries through this Exodus account to the last plague where we see the sacrifice of Christ is foreshadowed in the blood of the lamb on the doorposts.  So you see, the story we tell, the story God intended be passed on to the generations is more than locusts, it’s the story of the Gospel.”

He illustrated the power and purpose of God in using older generations to impact future generations through a letter written from his wife Lois’ grandfather to her when she was a teen.  Here is the excerpt of the letter Marty read.

Dear Lois,

Peace be unto you.

This is your grandpa, an old man 94 years old.  Time to go home, but I have 13 grandchildren and the question comes to me:  How many of them will follow in my trail?  How many will I meet at the judgment seat where we all will meet some day?  To how many will I hear Him say: “Come ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.  My prayer is: Lord please bring all my children and grandchildren with me into glory.  I would like to meet them all there.

Today, everyone whom that grandfather had on his heart is serving the Lord.

Posted by: Andy Farmer

In the book we’re featuring this week, "Worldliness: Resisting the Seduction of a Fallen World" (you can order it at a special sale price at ginormous sale), Pastor Craig Cabaniss offers some great questions for people of all ages in how they relate to media. 

Heart Questions

• Why do I want to watch this program or film?  What do I find entertaining about it?
• Am I seeking to escape from something I should be facing by watching this?  Am I seeking comfort or relief that can be found only in God?
• What sinful temptations will this program or film present?
• Do I secretly want to view something in it that’s sinful?  Am I deceiving myself by saying “I’ll fast-forward through the bad parts”?
• Similarly, am I telling myself, “I’ll just visit this web site once, and I won’t click on any other links I find there”?
• Am I watching because I’m bored or lazy?  If so, what does that reveal about my heart?
• Am I watching simply because others are?  Am I trying to be relevant or to fit in?
• How have my online relationships impacted my face-to-face relationships?  How has my online activity impacted my soul?  For better or worse?
• What motivates me to create and maintain a blog, MySpace, or Facebook presence?  Am I attempting to impress others?  Am I being prideful, slanderous, deceitful, or self-righteous?

Here is some additional perspective from Russell Moore on children and cell phones.

And from Al Mohler on social networking (Facebook, etc.) sites.

Posted by: Andy Farmer

In our Sunday message yesterday we discussed how families can grow strong along side the culture.  We learned that the enticement of the world is a very real and spiritually dangerous thing.  But we live and work and play and relate in a world we can’t leave.  How do we bring faith into this daily battle with the world?  In the book Worldliness – Resisting the Seduction of a Fallen World, Jeff Purswell gives us a God-glorifying perspective in his chapter, “How to Love the World.”  Jeff writes,

“A biblical worldview sees every moment of life lived under the sovereign grace of God and the enabling power of the Holy Spirit.  Scripture’s story is emphatic:  God’s rule extends to all of creation and therefore all of our lives.  As Abraham Kuyper famously put it, ‘There is not a square inch in the whole domain of our human existence over which Christ, who is Sovereign over ALL, does not cry, “Mine!”’

Therefore every second of life is significant…  A biblical worldview gives us new eyes to see all of life:  every sphere is charged with potential, every activity providing an opportunity to serve God, and bring glory to God.  Because God is sovereign over all things, and Christ is redeeming all things, all things matter to God.”

 We can be in the world, but not of it; enjoy its blessings without being trapped by its snares; and engage it with the redemptive hope of the Gospel.  We don’t need the world, but the world certainly needs us.

Worldliness is an outstanding and very readable book for understanding how to interact with the culture and be faithful to Christ.  This month Sovereign Grace Ministries is having a ginormous sale on this book (and other great resources) that will allow you to interact with a strategic resource in very challenging times.

Posted by: Andy Farmer

Here’s a little quiz on discipleship. 

First, read through the statements below about what it means to be a disciple. 

• A disciple doesn't go and learn something and then perform it.  A disciple develops godliness through application in real life over time.
• A disciple doesn’t bother to compare himself with others.  Who he is and what he does in light of what he should be and do is enough of a concern for him.
• A disciple is willing to have others observe his life
• A disciple doesn't mind being considered odd by others.

Second, watch the short video which you can access from this link (courtesy of Stephen Altrogge at The Blazing Center):  The Incredible Slingshot Man

Third, think about this:  If I could learn one thing about being a disciple from the Slingshot Man, what would it be?  (Hint – the statements above are a good place to start)

Posted by: Trish Donohue

I find it fascinating that so many parents, including myself, discipline their children in the bathroom.

 It certainly doesn’t seem like a logical choice—first of all you have to sit on the one available seat, presumably not the most attractive or clean one in the house.  Second, bathrooms are often tiny rooms, and I have emerged from many a loving discipline session feeling like I’ve been locked in a small closet with a wolverine.  Thirdly, it is the most frequently visited room in the house.  You can bank on the fact that as soon as you enter the bathroom with your suspect, someone will be pounding on the door while jumping up and down in obvious discomfort.  And you happen to be sitting on their source of relief. 

And yet there is some irony in the choice.  Because bathrooms have mirrors.  They have other things in them as well—recent finds in my own powder room include a hand-made bow and arrow, toddler-size undies (that’s always scary), and a Lego warship.  But there is always a mirror.  And I find the mirror an unnerving fixture when I’m disciplining my kids.  The bathroom mirror is a tool God uses to make sure the sermons I’m preaching to my kids are getting preached back to me as well.  

You see, after disciplining a child, I talk with them about what happened and about their sin and God’s mercy.  We’ve been well taught.  But any parent knows that these words of wisdom are not always received with rapt attention and deep conviction.  Yet no matter what behavior the guilty party is exhibiting, one person’s eyes are always watching me—my own.  The mirror becomes my teacher in those moments.  It has corrected me, encouraged me, and convicted me.

“Honey, it seems like in a lot of these situations you’re only thinking about what would serve you.  It doesn’t seem like you’re thinking of others or what would bless them.”  (The eyes in the mirror are watching.)

“Are we allowed to complain and become angry when we don’t get exactly what we want?  Is getting what we want the goal in life?”  (The ears in the mirror are listening.)

The mirror has diagnosed me perfectly.  How can I tell my children something that I still struggle with so much, calling them to a high standard when my own example is unsteady?  Are these sessions just a cycle of failures and lectures?  Should I go on?

But the voice in the mirror keeps talking…

“Love, you could never pay for these sins or earn God’s favor.  But God has done what we never could.  He’s made a rescue...”

As the redemptive truths continue, I’m reminded that God doesn’t give up on his children.  His mercy comes to us not just in times of obedience, but in times of failure—and failure again.  My kids and I all need a Father who is patient and loving to us.  I’m so glad I have a bathroom mirror to remind me. 

Posted by: Andy Farmer

Winter for me is a time of financial reckoning.  I get the final tally on what we spent on Christmas – which is always more than we planned.  In early January I  print my final budget report for the year where I learn afresh how my ‘shoulds’  line up with my ‘dids’.  And then I set my new budget ‘shoulds’ in place for the coming year.  I start pulling my tax stuff together.  And I get that year end statement that tells me how my retirement accounts did. 

Ouch.  The last one hurts this year.  If there’s any truth to the fact that misery loves company, then maybe we all are loving that ‘where did it all go’ feeling.  Most of the financial advice out there seems to call us to not panic.  Prudent investing looks at things in the long term. 

Perhaps at this time of new budgets and economic uncertainty it’s helpful to remind ourselves that the long term for Christians goes well beyond this current economic problems.  One of my favorite insights from Randy Alcorn is so helpful as I begin to look at my financial picture for the upcoming year.   

Let me assume the role of “eternal financial counselor” and offer this advice: choose your investments carefully; compare their rates of interest; consider their ultimate trustworthiness; and especially compare how they will be working for you a few million years from now.  (Randy Alcorn, Money, Possessions and Eternity, p.134)